Understanding that your partner is selfish in relationships can be a difficult and painful process. People who use others for personal gain are leeches, and they do not care who to hurt. No one deserves to be used (if, of course, you are also a leech, this is called karma), but your love and devotion is your vulnerable place for such a person and this makes it difficult to recognize his tricks.
Let’s discuss five possible signs that your partner frankly uses you for your own selfish ends. Perhaps it’s time to rethink your relationship.
1. Everything happens on its terms
If the partner does not give you the opportunity to independently make plans or at least take part in this, be wary. If he does not appreciate your time, emotional needs and efforts, then you are likely to be shamelessly used. Relations without concessions and compromises are not healthy, therefore pay attention to the following signals!
– Your actions almost always require his approval.
– Decisions on joint leisure, actions or meetings are made by him.
– Your ideas and suggestions are rejected or ignored.
Did you get the general idea? Has this happened in your relationship periodically or constantly?
2. Most partner communications are negative or neutral
Many experts on relationships convincingly prove that one-sided or mutual neglect is the best forerunner of failure of relations. What is meant by disregard? This is when you are considered mediocrity, a useless person or a loser. In other words, disregard is the opposite of respect. In relationships, disdain is manifested through negative judgments, sarcasm or criticism of you as a person. As you, of course, know, communication is the basis of relations. Now ask yourself, what is your communication with a partner?
3. You are making the most of the effort
Lack of efforts on the part of the partner in terms of working on relationships is often a sign of disinterest or, so to speak, disconnection. If you invest a disproportionate amount of energy, time and even money in your relationship, something is clearly not the case. Monetary costs are much less significant than your emotional and emotional investments. Money is transitory, but when your partner does not want to work, why should you work on relationships for two? Refusal of any responsibility is an indicator of immaturity and selfishness. No sane person will do this to the one he loves.
4. The partner does not “tag” your relationship
He is uncomfortable using the words “girlfriend”, “boyfriend”, “beloved person”, “second half” or any other definitions-markers that describe your relationship as stable and long-term. If you intend to initiate a dialogue about the seriousness of your union and intentions, the partner strains, keeps silent or simply ignores you. The simple reason for this reaction is that these relationships are not particularly important for him. In fact, he may not want relationships at all.
5. Your partner flirts with other people, and not in jest, but seriously
It would be foolish to seek excuses for such flirting. Why? Because it’s time to include common sense. Some people use flirting as a nice comic reception, and their partners know it perfectly well-it looks harmless and quite decent. Otherwise, open flirting is a behavioral model leading to infidelity. Of course, pathological lovers of flirting do not particularly think about the ethical side of the issue. Pay attention to this – it’s more than just a bright indicator, but rather a loud alarm that requires your urgent evacuation from such relations.